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| blogohblog.comblogging-recipe |
I recently made a comment on a post, where I couldn’t quite agree with what the blogger had written. There are many times I have received such comments too. This blogger wrote in reply that he doesn’t care what others think about the issue and was not prepared for any further discussions on that issue. While replying to my comment, this blogger revealed some great discoveries that came out of his big brain and said” And I close the case”, meaning he didn’t want further discussions on the issue, or ” Do not comment if you don’t agree with what I say”
I have, on the other side, seen very tough and hostile sounding arguments over some topics where the bloggers had commented and replied and gone back and again replied with equal or more power, and at the end, become good friends.
We are not here to change the world. Or to hammer our own ideas on to others.
At the same time, we can make ripples that can, on occasions form strong waves.... what we call ‘ the butterfly effect”.
This blogger made the comment that she doesn’t believe in writing about issues and supporting causes, but only believes in doing. That is a wonderful idea in itself. But then, how would others know about it?
Recently I came across a website, change.org. By bringing to surface many issues of social injustice, this site has mobilized opinions of millions of readers across the world, and has been able to make major changes in the attitudes of governments on many social and ethical issues.
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| Blogging não tenho nada a dizee |
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So, it is not that opinions have no value.
Matt Haughey is probably best-known as the creator of Metafilter, the first community weblog .He is the co-author of We Blog , and a contributor to numerous other books on technology.
“I was an absolutely dreadful writer until years of daily email and blogging let me practice to the point at which I finally feel I can write well and express myself.
“There are things I won’t write about because I know it would hurt my family or friends, and I’ve come to terms with those compromises. I’ve come to terms with the boundaries I’ve had to draw to maintain order in my life. ”
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| Hugh Mac leod httpgapingvoid.com |
This was something I learned over time and many mistakes. At the time I started blogging, I was in the middle of so many personal problems and took it as an outlet to vent out the issues. It took me time to learn that was a mistake. I had unknowingly hurt some people. After all, one can learn from own mistakes and from others too. That is why I mention it here, so that others could learn from my mistakes. As far as possible, keep very personal matters out of the blog, especially if it involves others.
“Don’t write every post for the social sites. It isn’t genuine and people get tired of it.”
“If you aren’t sure a post is good, sit on it for a day. If you still aren’t convinced, delete it. A bad post is worse than no post.”
“Be prepared to completely run out of ideas after the first 3-4 months.”
I have faced such situation where I had spent time thinking about what to write. I have seen experienced bloggers churning out posts daily, sometimes even many times a day and have wondered how they come across ideas. The difficulty is not to write, but to write something interesting.
“It’s easy to become big headed when people rave about how great you and your blogs are to the point where you end up being a complete jerk and think you’re the greatest writer. But on the flip side, it’s also easy to become disillusioned and depressed when they rant about and attack you. Part of the skill of being a good blogger that comes over time is that ability to know when to take on board what others are saying about you and when to leave it. It is important to listen to the praise and critiques of others but try to keep them in perspective or it could lead to your downfall”.
During an interview with Elizabeth Taylor, she was asked if she read much of what people write about her in the media. Her answer was no – she didn’t listen to or read anything ever written or said about her, good or bad. Her explanation as to why was
‘If you listen to the good things people say about you, you might just start believing them. If you listen to the bad things people say about you, you might just start believing them’
“One of the temptations of starting a blog is to spend more time trying to emulate other bloggers than establishing your own voice and style. While there are a lot of lessons to be learned from other blogs there is a lot to be said for developing a strong blogging identity of your own".
This is what experts say, and I am not an expert. With millions of bloggers across the world, it would be silly to think that I have become a great blogger. For me, it is just enough that I have met some nice people over the blog and befriended them.
After all, what is it all about?
Doc, each one has a reason for beginning to blog. For you it was a way to vent out. For me it was a way to escape indifference attitude due to a situation. I found blogging therapeutic. Its great to know people value your views and opinions and share ideas; one gets to learn a lot.
ReplyDeleteAs you said, not everyone takes the discussion in a healthy way. They are open to discussions and are willing to learn and share. Few say 'its my space, i write what i want. You dont like it? then dont comment' In a way its fine. Its one's own space after all. Its best to respect their thoughts and leave it at that.
Few of them get addicted to the number of visitors and comments and churn out something or the other to get the traffic on their website. The quality diminishes and yet they need numbers. Few rant and few are so subjective that your comments get repetitive.
Its best to keep personal things out as much as possible. Again we need to just see this a medium to connect with people who appreciate your thoughts and agree to disagree on occasions in a healthy way
nice topic and yes comment exchange and replies are important.
ReplyDeleteIt just depends for what reason people blog and with every individual reason for blogging changes.
First thought opinion comes in mind then action is taken.
doc, quite relevant and apt topic you got in.
ReplyDeleteIn fact I wonder about the diverse lot of the few friends ( not acquaintance) I possess.It is really exhilarating and good.What good it would be I were to pick and befriend and maintain only the ones who agree with me. It would be professing Bush doctrine, "if you are not with us you are against us".
But what I noticed is in Blogdom too is that if one has a divergent view point he/she is shunned, either way. That is sad and silly too!
its a very nice topic ..you choose..Actually speaking I observed most of the bloggers wants to increase their followers ..like past I got some mails...as to join me as I will follow you!
ReplyDeleteI mean ..its weird..I jus write as hobby and read what I like... it cannot be forced on someone
as for comments I will not make others happy unnecessarily..people have befriended me ...its okay for me...I will say what I like...its our free will and I think people respect those who say from heart..as genuine opinions!
Loved this post @Doc. You have covered a lot of issues, us bloggers can relate to.
ReplyDeleteExcellent, Doc! The cartoons are embarrassingly true! Blogging is just another way of expressing oneself and communicating with others. It is a social activity. Which means that it would be appropriate to maintain certain amount of decorum as we would in real life. Contrary to Anil's opinion, I avoid blogs I do not like, or such people whom I think are bigots, religious fanatics, block headed etc. I have nothing against them personally. Like you said, we are not here to change the world; neither the world will change if you ask it to. In real life we avoid contact with unpleasant people; so too in blogs.
ReplyDeleteTo me, my blog is like an open verandah where I sit in the evening, looking out at the vast landscape of life. It is a happy place; of course, once in a while I am disturbed, but peace settles in back. Blog is not an arena where we spar with others, showing off our writing or skills of repartee.
To me my blog is an expression of my thoughts and sometimes I may rant about anything personal also.and posts are my personal thing, so nothing good or bad about them,
ReplyDeleteBut I like all comments equally because people opposed to my view give me a new perspective, so they are evry important.
Dr A,
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post. I have to say that blogging has been such a fascinating experience for me. I started a year ago, and I think I continue working on what motivated me to start my blog: writing stories. In the meantime, I have met many interesting bloggers, and I've truly learned a lot from them. I want to continue learning, I feel myself just as a humble blog student.
I leave messages often, positive and encouraging messages for the most. If I don't agree with something, or dislike the post, I prefer not to leave a message. I have seen a few arguments on other blogs, and I prefer to stay out of those situations. I think that everyone is free to express whatever they want on their blogs. Good thing that blog owners have the privilege of deleting comments, that's what I'd do if something was offensive :-))
Doris
By the way, thanks for your kind and encouraging comments :-))
ReplyDeleteDoris
great topic Doc..you have covered all important messages..! sure comments are needed to keep blogging live n encouraging..!
ReplyDeleteTasty Appetite
A most interesting topic for discussion. Good post :-)
ReplyDeleteWell done! I enjoyed the way you structured your post, and, I might add, made your point. Now, regarding the man eaters in Peru I must know if folks in your region have the Cyclops under control :-). Have a wonderful weekend. Blessings...Mary
ReplyDeleteVery interesting topic. . And yea thought provoking too. .
ReplyDeleteA great reality check. People blog for different reasons and many comment for different reasons too. I have found bloggers who badger asking to follow their blog or some such thing. I find it distasteful. I loved this post!
ReplyDeletegreat post. made me think.
ReplyDeletein the final analysis, however, it's the blogger who decides his relationship with the blogsphere. no prescriptions.
the case you nentioned,---he should not provide for comments if they are not welcome.
doc, I agree with KPJ, if someone does not appreciate or welcome comments he/she should not provide space for comments. If one welcomes only comments that lauds his/her views then , I wonder if Blogs can help him.Certainly here we are not dealing with rapists and murderers . A hand shake to accept disagreement is certainly not uncivilised.unless some one says expressively, "your comments are unwelcome on my Blog".
ReplyDeleteThere are two kinds of interactions at a blog. one, somebody visits your blog and leaves a comment; two, you visit a blog and comment. There should not be any restriction in the former, except if the blog owner finds a comment unpalatable, he/she may delete it. In the latter, when you visit another blog, you should respect the blog owner's territory and restrain yourselves from unsavoury comments. These are not rules but certain etiquettes we may observe. Of course, we have every right to write what we feel is right, but a little decency, a little dignity wouldn't be too difficult, would it?
ReplyDeleteWhen I had written on the Makaravilakku incident, it generated a lot of verbal heat. Yet, we reacted in a civilized manner and there were no hard feelings. There was a blogger who used to visit my blog regularly did not comment on the post but wrote a post of the person's own, denigrating what i wrote on Makaravilakku. I think that is sly and mean. Of course, I did not comment on that post, but withdrew from following the blogger, because I felt that the blogger isn't worth my time; that it was better to avoid the blogger. The kind of views expressed by the blogger was diametrically opposite to mine and never would the twain meet. So why should I waste my time and energy on that person?
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHow important is it to comment on a blog? I would say very important. It is an acknowledgment of the writer, it is kind of knocking at the door when you enter a stranger's house. There is this particular blog I follow; he writes excellent poems; he is prolific; there is such a diversity of topic, such incisive, clear observation, such depth of thought. He has been writing for more than 3 years. Yet there are only two followers, myself and another. I occasionally leave a comment. But to my chagrin, he barely acknowledges my comment or pay a return visit. I still religiously read what he writes but do not comment.
ReplyDeleteLike I said earlier, blogging is a social activity that demands reciprocity. It need not be patting on each other's back, but there has to be a two-way channel of communication. If I were an asocial person, I wouldn't be blogging. So this person seemingly writes for the sole purpose of writing. He never visits other blogs.To blog merely for the sake of expressing oneself is like acting in front of a mirror. The actor does not exist without an audience.
Why should we be ashamed of craving attention? It is a natural aspiration. I would feel so happy looking at the increasing number of followers, increasing number of approval and appreciation. Some flaunt their wealth, some their beauty; bloggers flaunt their writing.
I have made some excellent friends through blogging, like you, Doc. Blogging has given a new dimension to my life, recognizing fellow human beings who share my values of life. It has made me appreciate life more. It has taken me across the borders of nations, beyond the confines of the little city I exist physically.It has tremendously improved my faculty of introspection and self-analysis. It has helped me to understand myself better. It has taught me a lot more than I would have learned through other sources. I exist in your mind and thoughts, Doc, as you exist in mine. It is as I have written at the title of my blog - ' This is just to let you know that I have passed by', nothing more. My existence is relative; if you do not acknowledge it, I'd as well be non-existent!
Sorry for writing such lengthy comments, but I keep on coming back to your post, it helps in understanding one's locus standi!
Blogging has been an enriching experience although of late I find my posts kind of repetitive.i've made quite a few friends in the blogworld. As one commenter mentions it is a two way process and one is treated to the opinions of others and learn to appreciate perspectives other than one's own.I don't mind adverse comments as long as it is well meant. Some act mean for the sake of it and I try not to take notice.
ReplyDeleteOh great lessons to keep in mind!
ReplyDeleteI would appreciate that blogger who said she doesn't believe in writing than doing. Definitely a wonderful statement. I am reminded of my comment to someone who asked to talk about my philosophy of life, that i don't talk it, i live it.
The blogger has held a rightful position regarding issues and causes i believe. Doing got much more than talking. But yes, to mobilize further support to the cause, you definitely need talking. At the same time, talking alone would only do injustice for the cause. Doing and talking should come side by side.
Hi,all
ReplyDeleteThe reasons for blogging are as much as people who blog.
I am really thankful to those who came up with their opinions.
One of the reasons we write is that someone should read . If no one reads, what is the point in writing? Balachandran has taken time and patience to come out with his observations. He is right. And at times like this I feel, comments are better than the post itself.
I was not at all trying to criticize that blogger. As Monalisa had commented, probably that blogger believes in doing than talking and she has the right to think so. But then, like Anil and KPJ said, they can clearly mention “comments are not welcome if they are against my view point”. I was trying to say, without talking, no one would know.
Rachna’s observation is quite right .Harman probably meant the same.” Following” has become something like a mutual business. You follow me and I will follow you. But for practical reasons, it has become necessary to visit other blogs and make some acquaintances when you start off with a blog. Otherwise, it is likely that the blog will go unnoticed. At least, one can follow only whom you think is good enough.
I make it a point to read all the comments and I also sometimes go back to where I have made comments, to see how others think about it. Sometimes I try to explain or correct if I have gone wrong. I think that is all part of the blogging business. Many a time I have found the comments are better than the original post, like this time. They give me more insight in to the matter than what I had gained from the initial research.
Thanks to all who made the comments. I know there are others out there who visit the blog and leave without comments. Once a friend of mine told me that she regularly visits the blog.” Why no comments?” I asked. ” Oh, I am not good at writing” was the answer. Many people still have the inhibition to write something. To those I want to say, this is not a writing competition…just write what comes to your mind. That is how we all started.
Before I started writing the blog, the only things I wrote were the occasional articles for medical journals and power point presentations. I never thought I would write something good, and in that, I am probably right.
There are bloggers like Doris who fills the canvas with the least of strokes. But the pictures are marvelous. That is an art.
Hepzibah always comes up with some original ideas. Anil, Balan and Insignia have exemplary writing skills. Mary always come up with something for a perfect bite .And by the way, Mary, I made a mistake .I meant Papua N Guinea when I mentioned the man eaters, not Peru. Cyclops, my God !
I don’t mention all the bloggers for lack of space. That is another side of blogging. Don’t get upset if we are not mentioned. I hardly find a place anywhere.
Samvedna, welcome to the blog.
Dr. A,
ReplyDeleteI've given you the Kreativ Blogger Award!
Doris
Good topic. I agree with both views, read a blog and if u have nothing to say,or if you disagree leave it as it is obviously someone else's views. At the same time i also sometimes feel i should point out my disagreements or agreements!! Its a tough nut:).
ReplyDeleteNice post Sir... and some equally good comments here in response to ur write up....
ReplyDeleteThe only thing i keep in mind while giving my comments that, "Any particular blog space belongs to that Gentleman and he has full authority to write whatever he thinks right, and if i don't agree i can say so but in descent way"
Regards,
irfan.
There's a lot of material here! I'm not sure where to start, so I'll restrict myself to saying "yes." It's all very true. I too have had to disagree with people, and I don't see why this should be a problem so long as you are questioning and not denigrating, and so long as you keep it civil. If you absolutely hate what the person has to say, chances are you shouldn't be reading them (in which case, being a bit immature, I would leave a nasty comment and then never come back) ; D
ReplyDeleteAs for attention, while I don't wish to be the most famous blogger in the world, etc, it's always nice to receive some recognition when you invest a lot of time in something.
Thought provoking, as always.
The cartoons u added along with the article are quite wonderful and matching..happy to know that blogging helped you to get rid of your personal problems..
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading this. You've touched on an interesting topic. Blogging is becoming even more and more popular, and I think it is important that someone reminds of us why we like it in the first place
ReplyDeleteAs always you give me so much to think about. I always find it annoying when I come across a blogger who is all to willing to put across their side of things but isn't quite so willing to listen, let alone consider, any one else's opinion. I hope you don't mind if I use your concluding graphic on my blog.
ReplyDeleteAlso, many thanks for the kind comments you left on my blogoversary post, I so value the time you take in not only visiting but in leaving your thoughts.
Comment by Anil Kurup
ReplyDeletehe could not post it due to tech reasons
Doc, I must say that this post is perhaps a fascinating and pertinent one. And your reply to the comments has been exhaustive.
Indeed as a caption in your post says, “Never have so many people written so much to be read by so few”.
And as Balan observed who would not fancy appreciation and attraction!
I have the following observations to make with regard to the content of the Post,the comments and your reply.
Blogging may be akin to throwing open the door of your house. If visitors, pleasant and unpleasant (from the commentary point of view) are not welcome then one should not Blog, should not leave the door of the house open. From my understanding , what one should accept and keep in mind foremost while deciding to blog is that there will be a thousand view points that may be diametrically opposite from yours. We are not alluding to rapists and murderers, with whom we may not want to shake hands. We are meeting people with diverse back ground, culture, and most of all conditioning. And must be if we want to air our views in public, be prepared for accolades and scathing or strong remarks. There is nothing called a personal or private space in public. If we should obstinately hold on to our views even in face of strong proofs and reasons to the contrary, then it is a different situation a lost cause. One should either have the quality to accept so or not make eloquent statements or comment outside the confines of ones private bed room.
The ruckus comments on Makarvilaku brought about is one example. Here I recall that we ( myself and to an extent Balachandran) went a bit jumpy and we did make amends. I believe that is the essence .The amusing and harsh retorts that came in for the “la affaire Saibaba” are another instance.
I feel that if we make an error of judgment or see that our point cannot be substantiated any further against the comments and reasons laid bare by a blogger, then rather introspect and make amends to our views. Obstinacy and adamant attitude for the sake of comforting one’s ego is diasatrous.
After all Blogging is supposed to enliven our thought process.
Yet again there are Bloggers who though they go through another Blog post seldom comment. Perhaps the topic is too much of a mouthful for them, or is quite an inconvenient truth, or perhaps they simply do not have the courage to dispute with reason.
Nothing will change the world and the way many people think,. Neither faith, politics or philosophies can put back “Humpty Dumpty back on the wall;”And if some one thinks that Blogging will change people for good, or better or worse that is like barking at the moon.
I would recommend your point about not being carried away by appreciations. Like reading that promotes erudition, interactions by word or by letters can season us. And if we chose to shut over selves to views that are different then it will be like living our lives in the “forbidden city”.
On the whole this is an interesting sphere and until some one proclaims that he/she is not in any mood to welcome a comment, why should we desist.
@Petty
ReplyDeleteYou could use the whole blog!
@Anil
I tried to post that comment.It disappeared again!
@Doris
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!I am honored
@Meera and Irfan
There would be as many opinions as there are bloggers !That is why we blog!
@Emily
Definitely.Like I said,what is the point in writing if no one reads? A blog,like yours, is a special one.It covers many aspect of fashion plus life as you see it.It is fun.You put in so much of of effort to create it.But then,someone has to appreciate the work,isn't it?
@Tomz
I also learned that is not a perfect solution.But,there as many reasons as there are bloggers!
@Brittany
Thanks for the visit.Come as often as you can!
some time i use my blog in the sense of personal diary,but often i want to share my thoughts with all my friends and it is natural to give or get feedback,but most important thing is that we must bear the opposite words with wisdom ,this all goes with our learning process and make us aware of more useful topics and issues.
ReplyDeletewonderful writing.god bless
Many a time blogger is looking to increase his/her following. Not sure how that is going to happen, if we keep closing cases. I was away, looks like I missed many posts. Will catch up.
ReplyDeleteInteresting. One other way to look at it is to consider the blog as a place to store thoughts, imagery, and stories we can rely on to remind us of the time gone by, of the times we had, of the things we cherished, of the moments that mattered and the like.
ReplyDeletehmm I wonder who that blogger is .. I do like ot get comments right or wrong , sometimes its a good way of know what is going around I might have heard or felt wrong and written about it but then someone out there can come and say something that might change my point of view.
ReplyDeleteWhen i started blogging i got 1 or 2 comments and now i get quiet a few and its not always that people like what i write or share the same thought .. I dont mind that I have been called names and what not over the time and years now but its ok .. a lot of bloggers know me by now ... and i am happy that so many come and give there views on what they think.. commenting is very important as mentioned in one of the comment up, its helps a person to grow up.
my blog is my views it should not make anyone angry same way the comments that come should not make me angry cause its the commentators view...
the cartoon on the article hilarious and ALL ARE SO TRUE... very true
Bikram's
Doc, I must say that this post is perhaps a fascinating and pertinent one. And your reply to the comments has been exhaustive.
ReplyDeleteIndeed as a caption in your post says, “Never have so many people written so much to be read by so few”.
And as Balan observed who would not fancy appreciation and attraction!
I have the following observations to make with regard to the content of the Post,the comments and your reply.
Blogging may be akin to throwing open the door of your house. If visitors, pleasant and unpleasant (from the commentary point of view) are not welcome then one should not Blog, should not leave the door of the house open. From my understanding , what one should accept and keep in mind foremost while deciding to blog is that there will be a thousand view points that may be diametrically opposite from yours. We are not alluding to rapists and murderers, with whom we may not want to shake hands. We are meeting people with diverse back ground, culture, and most of all conditioning. And must be if we want to air our views in public, be prepared for accolades and scathing or strong remarks. There is nothing called a personal or private space in public. If we should obstinately hold on to our views even in face of strong proofs and reasons to the contrary, then it is a different situation a lost cause. One should either have the quality to accept so or not make eloquent statements or comment outside the confines of ones private bed room.
The ruckus comments on Makarvilaku brought about is one example. Here I recall that we ( myself and to an extent Balachandran) went a bit jumpy and we did make amends. I believe that is the essence .The amusing and harsh retorts that came in for the “la affaire Saibaba” are another instance.
I feel that if we make an error of judgment or see that our point cannot be substantiated any further against the comments and reasons laid bare by a blogger, then rather introspect and make amends to our views. Obstinacy and adamant attitude for the sake of comforting one’s ego is diasatrous.
After all Blogging is supposed to enliven our thought process.
Yet again there are Bloggers who though they go through another Blog post seldom comment. Perhaps the topic is too much of a mouthful for them, or is quite an inconvenient truth, or perhaps they simply do not have the courage to dispute with reason.
Nothing will change the world and the way many people think,. Neither faith, politics or philosophies can put back “Humpty Dumpty back on the wall;”And if some one thinks that Blogging will change people for good, or better or worse that is like barking at the moon.
I would recommend your point about not being carried away by appreciations. Like reading that promotes erudition, interactions by word or by letters can season us. And if we chose to shut over selves to views that are different then it will be like living our lives in the “forbidden city”.
On the whole this is an interesting sphere and until some one proclaims that he/she is not in any mood to welcome a comment, why should we desist.
I totally agree with the post. And the cartoons also tell a story. Blogging is like chicken soup for the soul for many. And it is nice to make friends in the virtual world. No demands. And loyal in their own way
ReplyDelete@Baili
ReplyDeleteThanks for the wishes.There are as many reasons for blogging as there are bloggers.And how many read the blogs?
@Madhu
The only way to increase visitors would be to visit other blogs,at least,to start with.
@Anil
Yes,you do it so well.Yours is a wonderful example of a good travel diary and memories.
@Bikram
You are very much liked by everyone,Bikram.And I have noticed that you carefully handle the comments.
@Radha
Yes,I have made some good friends through the blog as well.It is real exciting to meet fellow bloggers.
Hi,all
ReplyDeleteI was about to wind up this discussion,then it happened again! I made a comment yesterday and the blogger was very upset.She also made another reply to a fellow blogger " stick to the topic" as if this was a university examination.She made it clear to me that I do not know as much as she knows,because of her research for the blog. I have to agree to that.The issue was something related to parenting,and I said my experience is limited to raising my children and grandchildren.And I see families on a daily basis with whom I interact socially.
The easiest way to avoid unhappiness is probably not to respond. Like I said, after some time in to blogging,and few followers,some people start thinking they are great bloggers and it gets in to their head.And so,today I have learned another lesson.
Age is no restriction to learning !
How did I miss this post and comments?Oh I forgot I was doing the disappearing act then!
ReplyDeleteSuch a lively post. I agree totally. I have been through most of this myself too. And I don't regret any if it. Blog about what interests you. Comment when you want to. At all times being decent.
Actually,come to think of it, what is the point of a post if everyone agrees with it?It's only with disagreements that we learn something new!
I got a bitt carried away with blogging too. I was all over the blog. Though I have made a few good friends that way, I am sure I have made a few enemies too.
Anyways, doc , yet another thought provoking post from you. And I am back to active blogging after a brief disappearance. Hopefully I will not make this new blog too personal.
Jyothi ( in a new Avatar)