New year thoughts from a painful 2009

The past year was really trying on me.In all ways...After years of struggle,I was hoping to settle down and find some time to do the things I really wanted to.Glued to work,one doesnt get time for anything else.In the run to make money,one forgets one's own life, and goes on to make lives for others.I spend endless time at hospitals now,not as a physician,but an attendant to my ailing daughter n law.It is easy to wish..Happy new year,but how can one accept such wishes heartily when deep with in,one is bleeding to misery.It's a tormented chapter … the others were painful, but not tormented like this year.Theres nothing I could ever say or do to change anything I have been through or that has happend. All I can do now is take the necessary steps to make myself mentally and emotionally healthy. Depression has a way of taking over logic and straying you. I dont know how long it will take to heal the wounds.Finally,they will.


What one man loves another loathes. One woman's joy is another's junk.Happy people get what they want in life--not just material things but intangible things like health and happy relationships


The Universe gives to those who have and takes from those who have not. People who live with a scarcity mindset complain about not having enough. They think about not having enough. They worry about not having enough.Total all that time dwelling in scarcity and you see why they never get what they want.


Whatever you focus on expands. Focus on lack and you increase lack. Focus on scarcity and you make what you have now even more scarce.Focus on pain and suffering and you get more of it. Do you agree that you will not find happiness on that path?How do you move out of scarcity thinking and into abundance thinking? You just do it. The way you run your head is a habit. You want to change from thinking and feeling loss and deprivation to happiness and abundance.What is truly satisfying does not come from what we posses but what we are. When you are fully contented with what you are then you can be considered as being happy.


I have been through a lot of bad things in my life and it has taken me a long time (probably too long) to figure out that no matter what happens, be it good or bad, that it is a valuable lesson for me to learn from and use it to better my life.Easier said,but I am trying to find ways out of the tangles.Allowing the past to control your present is a sure way to destroy your future. Your life will continue in a downward trend and you will hardly be able to achieve your goals and dreams. What happened in the past is done. There is nothing you can do about it. No matter how long you stay fixated on it, it will never go away until you make it go away. The past is only part of your present because you keep it there. Letting go of the past is in your hands.


The only way to put the past behind you is to make a decision to not be controlled by it any longer. If you are truly tired of reliving the past in your mind, you must make a choice to let it go. You are the only one who can do it for you. The question is how badly do you want to make the change?
I know there are others out there with worse problems than mine.But then,the beginning is to accept that one has problems.And then,accept help from those who really can help.


I dont have all or any answers to all problems, but I can be a good listener. Sometimes thats what we need. Talking things out can often help us to figure things out. Sometimes it seems so obvious the answers or reasons or whatever when we have someone to talk to. I call it an epiphany. The value of a good counselor and a good friend is unmeasurable.My friends come up with consoling thoughts all the time.I am indebted to them.And I try to pass it on to my family who look up to me for help.
That is how life goes. Happiness never waits for us at the end of the road.Learn to pick it up all the way,tiny bits of it,and enjoy every bite of it.


Have a wonderful new year.