The Lotus Girl

The lotus flower has a story to tell. It’s own. The lotus grows from roots embedded deep in the mud of a pond. Slowly, the first tiny flowers push through and the plant grows steadily up toward the surface, always striving for the light. And there it blossoms. We recognize this as a parable of how something pure and clean and beautiful can come forth from darkness and  mire. We see it as a symbol of how we too can work through our darkest, most painful circumstances to be reborn to something new. Once it breaks the surface, the lotus flower is transformed. It has risen through the mud to reveal its true identity and beauty in the glory of the light.

That is not just the way of the lotus; it is also the story of humanity.

I have often wondered. How the girl grew up to become such a lotus girl, in the middle of weeds, dirt and mud of this world? She grew up with them around.But grew up as the true lotus girl.All the while she knew they were all like leeches around.It had pained her a lot.

Kindness is not a sign of failure. Letting go is a way of love.

One of the most gripping dilemmas of human existence is undoubtedly the conundrum of contingency: the sense that the events leading up to any given moment are at the same time predestined and accidental. Which, ultimately, is the more terrifying notion that our destinies are predetermined, or the suspicion that they are a matter of pure accident? And how do we make sense of our lives when predestination appears to be the result of a series of accidents or contingent events?

My son was too young to marry. I had not even started thinking of his marrying. I had a daughter to be married off before him. That is what we generally do. We still take a girl as the major responsibility in the family.But to be young and in love is a difficult situation.The time when we call it ' blind'.

My son asked me once .
“Acha, What if the girl had fallen sick after I had married her?”
“We would accept it, we can’t change such things. Those matters are in the hands of God” I said
“Then why don’t you accept this situation? I love her and I will marry her, whatever.God will see us through every thing" .
I thought it was a genuine argument. I believe in God and in what we call destiny.

I also learned another lesson. He doesn't have to give every thing we ask Him  for.His plans are different from ours.

Life doesn’t have to be too long to be good. There are people who lived short lives and filled the world with heavenly fragrance.Others who live ordinary lives,looking after their own business of life .There are people living for long, creating trouble for others, and enjoy seeping through the smoldering wreckage of some one’s lives. They still do. They are like scavengers.They pick and poke on the innocent who have already lost much,and taken more than enough of  pain and suffering in life. 

 Why don’t we learn lessons? I remember having read a lesson during my school days, in the Malayalam class.  It was some kind of an autobiography of the Patriot Ramakrishnapillai, called ““After my Deportation”.
“The way we save money at times of plenty, to be used in times of nothing, is the experience we gain and learn from life".

We use those lessons when we face dire situations. If you see a notice “Mines ahead”, would you dare to walk that road? No. But some people would. They never trust others. They will walk the road and get hurt to learn their lessons, of no further use to them. They could be more painful than ever. One night’s sleep wouldn’t end this world. There are still more days and nights to come and go.One cannot cover up his mistakes with more grievous errors,and end up paying a heavy price.

 Recently an astrologer friend of mine said.
“There are problems out there.  “Sarpa Doshams and “Ancestoral curses” and so on   And you have to  do remedy karmas for that”.
I don’t know what others think about it. We are partly influenced by our religious beliefs and traditions.. We fix auspicious occasions for marriages( Muhurthams) and other important functions. We observe ‘Rahu timing” for everything. Then why not accept this as well?

Do things happen in pre determined ways? Can we alter what is written in our destiny? For that matter, is there something written and kept?


  1. Doc! Thought provoking notes on the lotus flower. Thank you for that.

    Not sure how the picture of hyenas link with the post or for that matter the title of the post - Am I missing something?

    To answer your question, I don't believe in destiny. We are at free will to make decisions - not forced into anything by a divine force.

    I trust our days are in His hands... but our actions alter the outcome...

    ~ NRIGirl

  2. I am in two minds 'cos believing in destiny heals mental agony.Like a certain disaster had to happen and it was not anyone's doing. Like when I see good people suffer for no fault of theirs, an ageing mother loses her child and no explanation seems satisfactory - the Karma philosophy comes in handy. But the logical side of my brain says that life is a mixture of the good, bad and ugly. We need to face it as it comes.

  3. @NRI girl. I understood. that pic was too cruel.These are fleeting thoughts,mixed up.Yeas ,we have free will,but does it happen that way?
    @ Hip Ma
    You are probably right.We are often helpless at many things happening in life

  4. we are making our destiny.Am believing like dat. God provides a blessed life to everyone with a remote control. September 26@04am

  5. This is my first visit here and will return soon.

  6. Very thought provoking. I sometimes am forced to believe in fate ... easier to attribute whatever happens to unseen, unexplainable powers. Ultimately it is each experience that tends to shape our beliefs. But what you have written of the lotus ... so true.

  7. Belief in fate cannot be a reason for being inactive or nervous regarding any problem that you face. I believe that one gets one's just rewards and feels stronger dealing with whatever fate deals us after putting in honest hard work, without expectation of fruit.

    And I enjoyed reading about the lotus flower. It brought back memories of a long time ago when we named someone without knowing that it meant lotus, and my mother, explained to us how perfect the name was given the circumstances under which the child grew in its early days ....

  8. Nice post. I am not quite sure yet if I believe in fate/destiny or not. But mostly I think things happen in a pre-determined way. If something is meant to happen; no matter what we do, it will happen. Getting married, dying etc as examples. But I could be saying this because its just easier to attribute everything to destiny. Over a period of I had learnt to accept a few things whithout judging if its right or not. The sooner we accept the way things are, the better is is for me. Not sure if I am making sense.

  9. @ BKC
    Welcome Sir.You are a serious writer and can guide.

  10. @ Bincy..yes many people believe so.But I still think certain things are out of reach.
    @ NRI girl.. I changed the name after thinking about what you said. They are fleeting ideas,still.
    @ Radha.. Yes,we think on same lines.

    @ U K.. But how ever active we become,still, does it happen for everyone,the way they want?
    Welcome to my humble blog. I like the way u write.
    @ Madhu, Yes,exactly.And that is what we call destiny..isnt it/

  11. I read your post its very interesting..I wud say DOC if everything we knew or wanted to keep it perfect the would be no sufferings and mental torch-er so...few things He has to decide ..(almighty) which is beyond ..anybody's control..

  12. Very thought provoking for this One Woman.
    You write in a very special way. I will return.

  13. A good article .. though i cud not understand fully i will have to read it again..

    i liked the way you define woman compared to a lotus indeed true ...

    as you say a few things rather i wud say a lot of things are up to god almighty he knows it all wonder what all he has got in store for us all ...

    Bikram's Blog

  14. Hi ,Dr.Antony.My first visit here.I believe in destiny but also in Karma and prayers .Though things are preplanned (my belief) sometimes we are given some options too ,that is if we recognize them.I try to give my best to any given situation and leave rest to the almighty.Sometimes things seem unfair but to move on is the only way.And also i very firmly believe in the power of prayers.

    Lotus girl story is beautiful and so is the picture.

    Thought provoking post !I am glad i came here.

  15. I believe in destiny completely, but then I feel we must keep doing our Karma also, as thats the only thing we can control.

  16. Doc, that made a wonderful, sobering read. You are asking the million-dollar question. i have often said in my posts that our search for certainties began at the knowledge in the sub-conscious mind ( we refuse to acknowledge that, though) that there is nothing certain, nothing pre-destined. Look around. Isn't life around proof-enough for the uncertainties, the vagaries? The search will continue till we admit to the truth of the Void.

    Happy to be your 'follower'!

  17. @Harman..when we go through difficult situations,I often find it difficult to accept them as chance happenings. please visit as often as u can.
    @ OWJ..thanks and welcome
    @ Bikram..I was confused my self. I tried to make it a bit more clear. They are fleeting thoughts.
    @ Kavitha. please do come. friends make sufferings easier.
    @ Samvedna. yes,most of us do it that way.Still...
    @ B V Great to see you here.I am not a seasoned blogger,and they are random thoughts.Your comments are valuable, and corrections too.

  18. I appreciate for your wonderful post. I enjoyed very much reading it. Its very nice and interesting.

  19. enjoyed the blog Dr Antony. The new setting/pictures is nice.

  20. @Babli; thanks for the visit
    @Anonymous: many friends suggested a change. Thanks.Come in as often as u can


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